"Tracing
my steps right back to you.
Racing
the clock to save an hour or two.
Facing
the fact I don't feel a thing.
I'm dealing
with what I can't control.
Feeling
confused cause I don't know
If healing is when you don't feel a thing.
Where do I go?
Where do I stand?
Where do I find myself again?
Where do I go?
Can't disappear.
Oh where do I go from here?"
-Relient K Where Do I Go From Here
Monday, March 30, 2009
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
I'm not dead...I promise
I know...I'm sorry. I've fallen off the face of the blogging world. I'm sorry...and this isn't a great post either. This is more for me than anything. So read on if you wish but I'm not exactly back.
I'M FREAKING OUT RIGHT NOW!!!! You know the days that you finally stop and see all that you have on your plate? The days that all your responsibilities catch up to you? Is this just me? I think it might be just procrastinators. IDK...but oh my goodness. I feel like I just went to an all you can eat in life and filled my plate to fit my imagination...and my arms can barely even carry my ambition to the table.
Here it goes...again this is more for me so I can think it through out loud sort of speak.
-I've been awake and non-stop since 3:30 this morning...so that's 18 and a half hours of non stop things all day.
-I have to memorize 2 parts in 2 days for a kids play that I haven't even read the script for. With all the craziness I don't even know the real details on all of this thing either.
-I'm illustrating for a slide show thing for my youth group. That's drawing, outlining and coloring 5 pages worth of things. Doesn't sound bad but it's about a half of an hour to 2 hours on each page I would think. I only have 3 pages left I think though.
-I'm sort of "auditioning" for illustrating a book...I think...again absent of details. But still I have a trial run I haven't done.
-I have paper work over due for work. It's not hard I just need to remember to fill in a few lines and turn it in.
-A friend of mine wants me to paint her room sometime by the end of next week I think.
-Another friend wants me to get together with her next week for her birthday. I still need to paint a shirt for her.
-I have 3 other pieces of art promised to other people that I haven't even started.
-I STILL have some thank yous to write that are 3 months over due
On top of all of this my room is trashed and my car is slowly becoming that way. I don't really think it's procrastination this time...I literally don't have time for everything.
For example lets take a look at this week shall we...
Tomorrow
7am-8:40) Get ready for day
9-12pm) Class
1-3) Practicum
3pm-6:30pm) Get production ready for GCB
6:30-7) Prayer for GCB
7-9) GCB
9ish go home go to bed
Thursday
7am-3pm) Repeat of yesterday
7pm-who knows- Function down town
who knows-Go to bed
Friday
7am-3pm)same old
who knows-late) GC Kids production
Saturday
6:15am-3pm) Work
3pm-7) Lights at church
7pm-who knows) Yp at church
Sunday
7am-1pm) Get ready for Church and do lights for services
3pm-10pm) Work
THIS IS MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so tired...it's fun and all really it is...but a day to stop. A day to hide. Sounds bad huh? It is kind of but a day were I just dropped off the face of the earth. No one knew I was free. No one talked to me. No one needed me somewhere or needed me to do anything. Just a day...ideally a week so I could have a day of rest and many days of getting things done...but would I? Being the procrastinator I am I probably wouldn't even with time on my hands. (Sigh) Goodnight.
I'M FREAKING OUT RIGHT NOW!!!! You know the days that you finally stop and see all that you have on your plate? The days that all your responsibilities catch up to you? Is this just me? I think it might be just procrastinators. IDK...but oh my goodness. I feel like I just went to an all you can eat in life and filled my plate to fit my imagination...and my arms can barely even carry my ambition to the table.
Here it goes...again this is more for me so I can think it through out loud sort of speak.
-I've been awake and non-stop since 3:30 this morning...so that's 18 and a half hours of non stop things all day.
-I have to memorize 2 parts in 2 days for a kids play that I haven't even read the script for. With all the craziness I don't even know the real details on all of this thing either.
-I'm illustrating for a slide show thing for my youth group. That's drawing, outlining and coloring 5 pages worth of things. Doesn't sound bad but it's about a half of an hour to 2 hours on each page I would think. I only have 3 pages left I think though.
-I'm sort of "auditioning" for illustrating a book...I think...again absent of details. But still I have a trial run I haven't done.
-I have paper work over due for work. It's not hard I just need to remember to fill in a few lines and turn it in.
-A friend of mine wants me to paint her room sometime by the end of next week I think.
-Another friend wants me to get together with her next week for her birthday. I still need to paint a shirt for her.
-I have 3 other pieces of art promised to other people that I haven't even started.
-I STILL have some thank yous to write that are 3 months over due
On top of all of this my room is trashed and my car is slowly becoming that way. I don't really think it's procrastination this time...I literally don't have time for everything.
For example lets take a look at this week shall we...
Tomorrow
7am-8:40) Get ready for day
9-12pm) Class
1-3) Practicum
3pm-6:30pm) Get production ready for GCB
6:30-7) Prayer for GCB
7-9) GCB
9ish go home go to bed
Thursday
7am-3pm) Repeat of yesterday
7pm-who knows- Function down town
who knows-Go to bed
Friday
7am-3pm)same old
who knows-late) GC Kids production
Saturday
6:15am-3pm) Work
3pm-7) Lights at church
7pm-who knows) Yp at church
Sunday
7am-1pm) Get ready for Church and do lights for services
3pm-10pm) Work
THIS IS MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so tired...it's fun and all really it is...but a day to stop. A day to hide. Sounds bad huh? It is kind of but a day were I just dropped off the face of the earth. No one knew I was free. No one talked to me. No one needed me somewhere or needed me to do anything. Just a day...ideally a week so I could have a day of rest and many days of getting things done...but would I? Being the procrastinator I am I probably wouldn't even with time on my hands. (Sigh) Goodnight.
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